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Thursday, October 20, 2011

I hope you got warranty on your face repairs Miss Del Rey.

If I was in charge, this girl would have her original face put back on.  Why would you ever give yourself permanent duck-face?  That being said, I will admit that she does look sexy and mysterious.  By sexy I mean she looks like she's in the midst of performing a sexual act (blowjob for those of you who aren't my mother), and by mysterious, I mean her price structure is currently an unknown. 

Excuse my pettiness.  Miss Lana Del Rey, you are a delicious creature.  I am insanely jealous of your talent, and heartbroken that I am not you.  I crave your voice, your looks (original and aftermarket), and your hair.  You probably have more hair in your shower trap than I have on my head. 


Thanks to Annelise at box of crayons for exposing me to her. 

Teresa

5 comments:

  1. I do love exposing people things to people, this is true.

    Isn't she a hot mess? So sexy yet so collagenised (I'm pretty sure that's a word).


    I started following you anonymously but after seeing your books on the right, fuck that shit, I'm following for realzies now. I mean, The Forgotten Garden, The Book Thief, About A Boy - I have to end the list there because I'm staring at the slideshow in a slightly manic way. Anyway, based on those books, I'm pretty sure we're BFFs. I'm coming over to go through your garbage for collectibles such as drain hair, and in return, I shall send you some of my eyelashes. x

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  2. Well this is awkward. I just got back from smelling your hairbrush. We must have just missed each other!

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  3. Dear Annelise,

    While I'm happy that you two found each other, you should know that Teresa once recommended that I purchase and read Hemmingway's The Old Man and the Sea. I will forever hold that against her and, frankly, you should too.

    C.

    Dear Teresa,

    Other than that, you are baller!

    C.

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  4. Dear Cary,

    It's not my fault you don't like books without pictures. Maus is a comic book. You (and everybody else) should try that one. AhMayZing.

    I had to look up the meaning of baller. I don't think you can be baller if you have to look up baller. It makes me the opposite of baller; I am cuber!

    T.

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  5. Dear Cary,

    Duly noted. Unreasonable (on my behalf) grudge against Teresa now in place.

    Annelise.

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